The Lord Hath Done Great Things For Us

N. E. D.

It stands for No Evidence of Disease. 

It is what anyone battling any type of disease longs to hear. 

The actual words from the Doctor's report read: 

"CT scan does not show any evidence of relapse disease."

"At this point, I do not see any need to offer her a rechallenge with CD4/6 kinase inhibitor therapy with aromatase inhibitors... I will follow her tumor marker monthly and repeat her CT scan in 3 months".

Are there even words to describe how it feels to read that? Not only is it gone but there is also no evidence of its return. I find it truly challenging to convey how I feel but Psalm 126:3 comes immediately to mind. 

"The Lord hath done great things for us; whereof  we are glad". 

We are glad. We are very glad. 

And we are many other things too. 

We are thankful. We are so incredibly thankful, first and foremost to the Lord and then also to each one of you who took the time to pray with us and for us. The effectual, fervant prayer of a righteous man that availeth much. (James 5:16) The Lord heard and answered our prayers and we marvel at Him. Sometimes His answer is not what we want or expect and sometimes it does not make sense to our finite minds. In this case however, His answer was in agreement with our prayers and we are so incredibly thankful for that. We are also so thankful to the men and women who have done so much work, some at great cost, paving the way for others, like me. I know there will be some who will say, "But you took medicine! It is just the medicine doing what it was designed to do". Yes! You are absolutely right! I am so incredibly thankful for the medicine, both conventional and alternative, and that the Lord led us to it in His time and in His way. I am so thankful that the Lord can and will use whatever means He chooses to bring about His will. Sometimes He answers miraculously with no effort required on our part at all and sometimes, it is good for us to do all that we can but to ultimately, still leave the results with Him. In short, drive safely but wear your seat belt!

We are in awe of His Goodness. Lord, not a day goes by but we see Your power to give life and to take it away. And in all things and in all ways, your name is Blessed. (Job 1:21) We have this tendency to think that the Lord is only Good when things go the way we think they should or when our prayer is answered exactly in the way that we have asked. No, the Lord is always Good. (Psalm 100:5) I can be (and have been) lost in grief over the loss of a most beloved friend or family member and am still able to declare the Goodness of the Lord. That His ways are higher than mine and His thoughts, higher than mine (Isaiah 55:8-9). I may call on Him from the ends of the earth as my heart grows faint, to lead me to the rock that is higher than I and be my shelter and strong tower (Psalm 61:2). And still He is Good. He will cover me with His feathers, and under His wings, I trust Him, His truth is  my protection, (Psalm 91:4) His rod and staff, my comfort and consolation (Psalm 23:4b). The Lord himself goes before me and is with me, not failing or forsaking me one step of the way (Deuteronomy 31:8). Of what do I have to fear? What can possibly surprise Him or separate us? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. (Romans 8:35-39) And still He is Good. I might have hoped and prayed for an outcome different than His at times but make no mistake that the Lord is Good and no matter how He answers, where His people are concerned, all things work together for good, to those that love Him and to those who are the called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28) Whether we understand it or not. And still He is Good.

We are mindful of the present and trusting for the future. One of the first things that comes to mind after being given a clear report is "will it come back?" I would not have you believe that this doesn't present a challenge to me as well. With the doctors very unwilling to use words like "cured", or "healed" or even "remission" and with the understanding that I am still technically being treated as a palliative case, I would be foolish not to think that I may, at some point, have to deal with cancer again. I continue to have neurological issues that, at least in the interim, remain undiagnosed. They are not even remotely close to the degree that they used to be and thankfully, my MRI was clear but that I am still having them, remains a concern. It is important for me to remain as viligant as ever and continue to do what things that I am able to do that will continue to keep me as healthy as possible. The future, however, is not mine to worry about. It has not been given to me yet, and therefore I also have not been given the grace to deal with it. Fear is very real and it is also very counter productive. It can easily create a vicious cycle as it causes our bodies stress and therefore can actually inhibit the healing process. I confess, this is an ongoing struggle of mine so while I know the right answer, I still have to fight this pesky flesh of mine on it. My tendency to want to know how the story ends is a weakness of mine. Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. No promise there of showing me the whole road. Just the next step. And then the next one after that. And the one after that. This is the day that the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it. (Psalm 118:24) And we will let tomorrow look after itself. For surely there are enough problems there of its own. (Matthew 6:34)

We are at peace. I know I took a long break from blogging and part of that was for my own well being. Cancer and I needed a break from each other. Sometimes, when you focus on something for a longish period of time, it can become all consuming. You think of it all day, throughout the day and into the evening and it can easily rob you of peace. Sometimes you have to put things back in their proper prospective and think of them in the proper place and time. (2 Cornithians 10:5). Sometimes we need to take a long break from thinking about them altogether and focus on the things that are good. (Philippians 4:8). Often they are things right in front us. Like people. And relationships. And laundry. Ahem, I say that because let's be real, laundry is always there. It is always there right along with a myriad of other household chores that can only be ignored for so long before needing our time and attention. Taking a break from cancer allowed me to be more peaceful and intentional. Even the most mundane chore can be peaceful. It allows us to focus on the concrete instead of the abstract. Not necessarily always flattering. But real. 

We are hopeful. Last year when I wrote this post we were facing a very bleak outcome. The doctors were not convinced that things would go well for me. They told me "I'd need a miracle".  And so we hoped for one. We always hope. We continue to hope. We trust the Lord for His direction but as long as we have breath, we hope. 

We are also pragmatic. It would be silly to ignore the elephant in the room which is the current global pandemic that we find ourselves in. There is much I could write on this topic but rather I will quote the words of C.S. Lewis that he penned 72 years ago in an article entitled "On Living in an Atomic Age" (1948) in Present Concerns: Journalistic Essays.  Feel free to replace the words "atomic bomb" with "coronavirus".  

In one way we think a great deal too much of the atomic bomb. "How are we to live in an atomic age?" I am tempted to reply: "Why, as you would have lived in the sixteenth century when the plague visited London almost every year, or as you would have lived in a Viking age when raiders from Scandinavia might land and cut your throat any night; or indeed, as you are already living in an age of cancer, an age of syphilis, an age of paralysis, an age of air raids, an age of railway accidents, an age of motor accidents." In other words, do not let us begin by exaggerating the novelty of our situation. Believe me, dear sir or madam, you and all whom you love were already sentenced to death before the atomic bomb was invented: and quite a high percentage of us were going to die in unpleasant ways. We had, indeed, one very great advantage over our ancestors - anesthetics; but we have that still. It is perfectly ridiculous to go about whimpering and drawing long faces because the scientists have added one more chance of painful and premature death to a world already bristled with such chances and in which death itself was not a chance at all, but a certainty. This is the first point to be made: and the first action to be taken is to pull ourselves together. If we are all going to be destroyed by an atomic bomb, let that bomb when it comes find us doing sensible and human things - praying, working, teaching, reading, listening to music, bathing the children, playing tennis, chatting to our friends over a pint and a game of darts - not huddled together like sheep and thinking about bombs. They may break our bodies (a microbe can do that) but they need not dominate our minds."

And last, we are somber. We would be remiss if we did not recognize the pain and suffering that our dear, dear friends have gone through and continue to go through, even as recently as last weekend. Our hearts break with them even now. It is difficult to explain this feeling of being happy and sad at the same time. But I hope you can hear my heart. We mourn with those who mourn. We look forward with them to the great day when the tabernacle of God will be with us, and He will dwell with us and we will be His people and God Himself will be with us, and be our God. And He will wipe away all of the tears from our eyes; and there will be no more death, or sorrow or crying, neither will there be any pain: for the former things will have passed away. And He will sit upon the throne and say, Behold I make all things new. And he will say, 'write these words for they are true and faithful'. And He will say, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely. (Revelation 21:3-6)

The Lord has truly heard and answered our prayers.  

And we are glad. 

~ There Is A Redeemer ~

There is a Redeemer, Jesus God's own Son, 

Precious Lamb of God, Messiah, Holy One.

Thank you, O my Father, 

for giving us Your Son.

And leaving your Spirit till 

the work on earth is done.

Jesus, my Redeemer, name above all names

Precious Lamb of  God, Messiah, O for sinners slain.

Thank you, O my Father,

for giving us Your Son.

And leaving your Spirit till

the work on earth is done.

When I stand in Glory, I will see His face;

There I'll serve my King forever in that Holy place.

Thank you, O my Father,

for giving us Your Son.

And leaving your Spirit till

the work on earth is done.

Words/Music: Melody Green, 1982

© Birdwing Music/Cherry Lane Music Publishing Co., Inc.

For this cause, I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man; That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height, And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fullness of God. Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.

Ephesians 3:14-21